Stop Asking For Advice

This is around the time of year when everyone’s New Year’s Resolutions begin to go to shit {is it too soon to say I told you so?} and we all begin to turn to our friends and family for advice about what’s going wrong / how to fix our lives / etc.

So, I’m going to give you some advice - STOP ASKING FOR ADVICE.

Here’s the deal: asking for advice is a terrible idea — not because your friends and family possess bad judgment, but rather people will always give you answers based on their perspective.

Say you want to start a business, so you reach out to your closest friend. This friend has known you for years, supports you like crazy, and wants nothing but the best for you. The issue is this friend is not business-minded. This friend works a steady nine-to-five corporate job and plans to retire from the same position in thirty years.

Why is this an issue? Their perspective doesn’t align with yours. They will likely discourage you from starting the business and encourage you to stay with the route perceived to be more stable because of their point of view and where their values are aligned. They’re going to give you the “truth” based on their perception.

It’s as if they’re viewing the world through red lenses and you’re viewing it through blue lenses. So when they look at the sky, their truth is purple while your truth is blue. The aligned decision for someone who is an entrepreneur is going to be drastically different from the aligned decision for someone who is comfortable as a corporate employee — which is perfectly fine (and normal!).

Simply be aware that going to someone who hasn’t experienced the results you want will not guide you in the right direction. If you choose to receive input from someone, be very discriminatory about whom you seek out. Find a mentor, coach, or advisor currently experiencing the results you desire and ask them questions about their experience.

But remember, even if this person has experienced the results you desire, no one can fully know your viewpoint or your trajectory but you because it exists only within you. Asking someone else to make your decision for you causes their life trajectory to become yours. It doesn’t work. Your path is unique to you. Use your intuition as your North Star. Let it guide you. Trust that even if you have no proof in the Physical World, the Spiritual World will take care of you.

You have the answers you seek. And if you can’t locate them on your own…. Find a coach or mentor to help you uncover them.

Love + Leaps,

Signature SMALL.png