New Opportunity.... Ask Bri Anything!
If you had the chance to ask me anything - what would you ask? I have started a new monthly series to answer all your questions about being a woman, entrepreneurship, taking leaps and more.
Today’s question comes from…. Well, a lot of you. I think this is one of the most common questions I get asked.
“How did you get X, Y, Z?” Specifically - most people want to know how I began writing for the Huffington Post, and more recently how I got Naveen Jain to write my foreword for Permission to Leap.
Here’s my super, top secret trick: don’t ask for anything.
Yes, you read that correctly.
Here is how both interactions went down:
1. It was late-May, 2014. I saw Arianna Huffington speak at the California Women’s Conference the day before I received an ill fated email from my boss: We’re cutting your pay in half. My mind and body both spun into panic while I consciously observed the chaos ensue. But instead of going down the rabbit hole, I reached for my notebook and re-read my notes from the conference. Arianna had spoken about the silver lining and how she used her medical tragedy as fuel for her growth. I heard a small voice inside say, “Email her.”
It went a little something like this:
I’m writing to thank you for your talk yesterday at the conference. I got home to find out some bad news, and because of your words I am doing my best to stay in the trust and knowing that the silver lining is there even if I can’t see it.
Since attending the conference, I have decided to move forward with a project interviewing hundreds of women about what it means to be a woman. I’m very excited about bringing this topic to the world since it’s underrepresented.
Thank you for sharing your story and helping me through mine.
Just five hours later I got a response:
Would you like to start writing for the Huffington Post?
2. I saw Naveen Jain speak at Archangel Master’s in January. His humor and perspective instantly captivated me. I was fascinated by the thoughts he shared and the way he approached life. A week after the event I wrote him a message on Facebook:
Hi Naveen! Reaching out to connect quickly - I was at Archangel, but didn't get a chance to meet you there. I loved your spirit and your perspective on things on stage that day. During your presentation I immediately sent my best friend your statement about how making money is the same as orgasms. So good!!!
Thank you for sharing so openly with us all that day. I've just made a bold declaration about my goal a few weeks ago and just keep thinking about how anything is possible despite my current perspective - including you getting permission to go to the moon.
Much love + I hope we get the opportunity to meet in person soon! Bri
And, again, a few hours later I got a response:
Let’s set up a time to talk.
How is it that I received not only responses, but invitations from two of the world’s top entrepreneurs within hours? Of course I can’t know for sure, but my inclination is I didn’t ask for anything. I didn’t want anything. I wasn’t trying to get anything.
In both situations, I was simply reaching out to express gratitude. And in both situations, I was gifted something infinitely more remarkable than if I had approached the relationship to ‘get’ something out of it.
The idea of the ‘go-getter’ has been engrained in our culture. Questions of, “how do I get X, Y, Z?” or, “how do I convince someone to do X for me?” are so common place.
I totally get it - we all have things we want. By leading with an energy of ‘getting’ you will actually repel what it is you desire.
I believe that both of these openings were created in my life because my energy was pure. I was simply reaching out to express gratitude. Naveen even told me he can immediately tell if someone wants something from him, and it immediately turns him off from the interaction.
So next time you’re looking to create something new, lead with gratitude and develop more of a ‘go-giver’ attitude…. Then watch how the world responds around you.
Love + Leaps,