The Art of Surrender
On this episode of But, How? A podcast to help visionaries bring their ideas to life.... I'll be sharing about the hardest part of creation - surrender. We all have ideas about HOW it must happen, but as humans we don't have the full perspective. Trying to control and manipulate your path will not work. The Art of Surrender is what will bring magic + miracles to the forefront.
I know what it’s like to be a visionary entrepreneur out in the world. And all of the things that we’re told we should be, and how we should do this and should do that. I am not here to should all over you.
I am here to awaken possibility within you. I am here to show you that what you desire is truly, truly possible and it’s probably not as difficult as you think it is. Today I am going to be sharing with you probably one of the top ingredients to this whole “how” process. We can see all these things about the beginning and the end, but we can’t always see the middle part of our journey.
Then we get an idea of how the middle part should look. We see how someone else’s middle part looked or how someone has told us our middle part should look. We get an idea and then we latch onto it and we hold onto it so tightly.
What happens is we latch onto this idea of how we think it should look. How we think our vision should be brought to life. We end up closing ourselves off to all the magic, all the synchronicity, all the things all around us that the universe is trying desperately to bring our way to give us. We’re closed off to it which prevents the universe from doing its job (its job being to help show you and guide you along that middle path of the “how”).
Watch the video above to hear the magical manifestation I created prior to my recent trip to New York City and the surrender I employed in the process.
When we focus in on it looking a certain way and we out these blinders on and say this, “One way is the only way that my vision can come to light.” We literally shut down to the universal magic that is all around us. The universe just wants to send you what it is that you desire. It doesn’t care how.
Whatever it is that you are desiring of in this moment right now the universe has no choice but to give it to you.
The problem becomes when you have expectations of how it looks. It is going to show up differently than you expect it to. It always does. It always shows up differently than you expect it to. And if you’re holding onto that expectation of how this thing is going to come into your life. If you’re holding onto that so tightly, you are preventing yourself from seeing it when it does show up. If you have expectations that you’re going to meet a man and he’s going to be six and a half feet tall. Maybe he shows up and he’s five foot eleven, you’re going to not be able to see him because he’s not “what you think he should be”. If you have an idea about a job that has to be in a certain industry or it has to look a certain way or it has to have a certain this or it has to have a certain that. and it shows up looking differently than you thought it was, you’re going to shut it down and not engage with it because you have these expectations of how it should look.
Surrender is one of the biggest keys and practices that comes along with this process of how. Right now, in this moment, as you look towards your future, your perspective is limited by what is currently in your world. “Well I live here, I make this much money, I have this much this. I have that. I have these things … that’s my reality.” Your reality is going to be different in three, six, nine, twelve months. It’s going to be different. Then your perspective is going to change.
You can’t base what’s going to happen in your future off of exactly where you are in the present. You have to open up to what else is possible. You have to open up to the magic. The serendipity. You can’t expect to build a path exactly where you are right now. You have to start laying the bricks little by little and all of the energy around what’s coming will open up. So, let go of how you think it should look. Let go of all the ways that you are expecting this to happen.
In January I asked the universe for a sign. I was sitting at my altar. I was playing with this deck of cards called the earthbound oracle, which I love. I was in a muddy place and I was a little frustrated and feeling off and icky. I was like, “All right, I just want to know that I’m on the right path.” Which is so ridiculous, right? We’re always on the right path. The universe is like, “Okay, let me show you again that you’re on the right path.” I pull a card and the card was travel, it had a Monarch butterfly on it. I was like, “All right, universe. I want a sign today.” I don’t just want any sign today. I want a Monarch butterfly. Show me a Monarch butterfly.” I pack myself up and I get myself ready and I go the lake. I go to Echo Park Lake like I do most mornings. And I’m taking my two miles walk and I think, “That’s where the universe is going to send me that sign. I just know it. there’s butterflies around that lake all the time. There’s so much nature around that lake. That has to be exactly where the universe is going to send me my sign. I just know it.”
What do I do? I lap once around the lake, mile one. I lap twice around the lake. Not a single butterfly in sight. Not any butterfly. Not just not a Monarch, no butterflies on my walk that morning. Not one. So, I’m heading home and I’m like, “Dammit. There is no way I am going to see a Monarch outside the window to my apartment. That’s just not happening. I live in downtown L.A.” Now granted, I have seen some crazy things. There’s some humming birds that live around here and stuff but I was like, “I am not seeing a Monarch butterfly. The universe is clearly not listening to me. It’s not sending me a sign."
Then that afternoon I decide to take myself out for lunch. I deserved it. I went to go get an acai bowl. Now, here’s where this story becomes really interesting because me going to get an acai bowl is not new. I am very much a creature of habit. When I go places I take the same routes. I’m very much a creature of habit. I do not deviate from my routines. I eat the same thing for breakfast every morning. I am very much a creature of habit.
I’m on my way to the acai bowl place and I’m trying to walk the same way that I walk every single time I go to the acai place. I always walk along the north side of 9th for whatever reason then I get to Hope and then I take a right. Always. Now the block of the north side of 9th between Hope and Grand was closed because they have construction. So that block of that sidewalk was closed. I had to go up Grand, over on 8th and down on Hope. I had to take this whole detour to get to my acai bowl place. I take the detour and I get literally the same thing that I order every single time I go to the acai place because, creature of habit. I get my power bowl, sub gluten free granola, sub almond butter, no bananas on top. I’m sitting there. I’m eating my bowl, enjoying my lunch and I remember, “I need to get avocados. I need to get avocados for breakfast tomorrow morning. Should I go Whole Foods or should I go to Ralphs? Well, Ralphs is in the same building pretty much as the acai bowl place, I’ll just go there because it’s really close."
I walk south on Hope. I get to Ralph's. I get my avocados. I put them in my purse. I get back to the corner of 9th and Hope, and I can’t cross over on the north side of the street again because: construction. I have to cross over to the south side of 9th street in order to get home. I’m standing on the south-west corner of 9th and Hope, crossing over to the south-east corner of 9th and Hope, listening to Pharrell’s Happy, bouncing in my step. “Because I’m happy …” I look up and I shit you not, there’s an electrical box on the south-east corner of 9th and Hope covered in Monarch butterflies. Covered. Painted. All over. All four sides of this box are covered in Monarch butterflies. One, I started choking on my own spit. Two, I almost tripped. Three, I started crying.
I had this expectation it was going to show up a certain way and I was looking for it to show up that way. Thankfully I was open to receiving it another way because the universe wanted to surprise me in that moment. I got my sign. Again, it didn’t come in the way that I thought it was going to come. And I got pissed off about it not coming in the way that I thought it was going to come. The universe had a surprise in store for me. When you start telling stories about things not looking the way they should look or things not happening the way they should happen. If a client fires you or you don’t get a speaking spot that you wanted, or you … Who knows what’s happening? Who knows what the circumstances are in your life? But be open to whatever you’re desiring, this how, be open to it coming to you in a way that you never expected. The more that you hone in on it having to look a certain way the less likely you are going to see it when it shows up.
So, surrender. I know that sounds so airy, fairy, “You just need to like surrender. You just need to like let go.” But it’s true. It is really true. The less you have expectations about how, the more likely you are going to be able to bring whatever this thing is craving, craving to be brought to life inside of you the easier that is going to be, I promise.
This week, how can you invite a little more surrender into your experience? How can you invite a little bit more open energy, a little bit more childlike wonder, a little bit more magic? And really let the universe support you, because you’re not doing this alone.
You’re not in this alone. There is this unseen force rearranging things behind the curtain of life that you will never be able to see. At least until they come in to your experience. When the universe is behind the scenes rearranging all the parts and pieces, we never get to see that but it is always happening. It is always happening on our behalf for us. This week, play with surrender. Be open. I guarantee you the universe is trying to get your attention. It is trying to help you bring this idea to life and it’s up to you to listen, and trust, and surrender.